Ha once upon a time….In the cold winter of November in Chicago…my following a DJ about and giving him a tape to play (once I got there the Rusty Pelican???) ha ha. All too funny I heard the beat and thought fuck it. I don’t need the other side of the tape. I knew then when he played it for me….I could do anything. Because 1. No one else danced. 2. I got others out there….3. I didn’t give a flying fig. All I wanted was to get my head in the speakers and dance. Life is a Dance. Do it. Dance…..be brave…be wanton…be mad and always….take it, it’s your’s.
Okay so at a young age, child of the 70’s am I….I decided to run all sorts of experiments (when my brother wasn’t around to experiment on) Including but not limited to: Does Johnson and Johnson baby shampoo really make you NOT have “No More Tears?” I’d say it still made your eyes sting….but not as bad as say Alberto V05 Shampoo Strawberry scent. Actually spraying hairspray in your eyes at age 5 accidentally was pretty fantastic. (the nozzle was pointed the wrong way)
I’d also sneak into (ok I was allowed to play) in my moms bedroom, closet and bureau and dresser thing and I’d try on her leather gloves trying to figure out why I liked the feel and oooh the smell. (Nothing to do with masochism)
I’m headed backwards now, admittedly I got used to the taste of soap because I used to sass my Mother. I wasn’t sure what sassing was (I couldn’t google it) nor was it explained to me. So the first time I had to have my mouth washed out with soap I decided that wasn’t overly fun but for future reference I’d taste every bar of soap imaginable so I could prepare myself for the next time. This worked wonders! Subsequently there were more next times.
I mean there were signs of course as time went on but I didn’t know that was sort of masochistic behavior. Sticking my finger in an electrical outlet for example. You weren’t supposed to do that when your 5 and I wanted to find out why. Needless to say I didn’t do THAT again. I had a fantastical imagination at a very young age. I have no idea how that happened and it won’t go away. Of course I had a curious mind and natural sexual curiosity followed at a very young age. I’ve since learn to go with it. Run like hell for all it’s worth and don’t look back, they may be gaining on you.
Sir. An easy word, if your perhaps from the South. Or perhaps Addressing VERY OLD PEOPLE… or a crabby domineering man. I’m not I’m from the South, nor am I military. I’m a Northern chic and we are very busy. Yes I have manners, moreso “please and thank you” and a wink and a smile can go a long way. Throw in the fact I’m a reformed Irish Catholic and I have problems saying this word.
When I decided to attempt what I thought would be a foray into “online bdsm” 3 months tops surely right??” I had to literally call common things like my dogs, my car, utensils, my socks…SIR. This still didn’t quite work I’d sputter if I talked to my Master, luckily Master tends to roll off my tongue easier. I’ve….tried to negotiate with my Master. Can I call you Mister? (Btw my Master has a grandfather that had the same problem) Mister Sir? Mister Kevin? Oh God we’ll be in public one day and I’ll just forget (yay spanking for me!)
Fast forward about 8 months later and I took a Taeqwondo class. OH not only could I not call the Sensai SIR but I’d end up just sputtering “Yesssthhhh” vocals fading away. I’ve been in the service industry, event planning and public manners are not lost on me but I’ve ALWAYS avoided using those words, Sir, Madam, Ma’am??? Ma’am?? (Funny recalling Cher in “Burlesque” DO NOT call me MA’ AM!!!) I….can relate to this. I explained to the sensai that I …was working on this. He was ok with it.
Fly forward to now….I’m better with the Sir thing. If you ask me having that even used by me is a privilege. However that’s my ….opinion. I’m just me who I am. Non military and I will have no problem redirecting you from that end statement as I hold the door open and you walk thru it. Unless a true gentleman or my Master is holding it open for me. I’m old fashioned like that. “Thank you”